The matters of the heart are sometimes bigger than what we acknowledge…
I have spent years with a smile on my face and appeared to be nonchalant with a heart full of anger, insecurities, hate, jealousy and envy.
I thought that just b/c people couldn’t see what was going on in my heart that it was okay. If I was nice enough or even portrayed myself as unconcerned, I thought that what was going on inside would just go away and wouldn’t harm anybody.
I was sooooo wrong! My heart affected my relationship with God, others and everything about me. There were so many things that I had in my heart that were literally killing me daily. Low self-esteem, comparisons to others and thinking that I wasn’t important all came from my heart.
Although I never spoke some things out, the very sight or thought of some people caused the ugliness of my heart to boil over into my entire being.
Everything that is good and even what’s bad starts in the heart. I’m learning to keep my heart clean by being honest with God, speaking the Word and positive affirmations and studying the a Word.
A clean heart has brought me so much freedom, peace, confidence and a more intimate, real relationship with God that goes way past what people see…it’s goes and shines a light on every dark, dingy spot that tries to keep me stagnant and sitting in a place of judgement and scorn. A clean heart keeps me in a place of humility. Always recognizing my need for my Savior. Apart from Him a clean heart is an impossibility…but w/Him, and His grace, my heart is made new…daily.