Marriage…Existing or Thriving???

One of the things that I enjoy about my marriage is that I really like my husband…we talk. Laugh. Dream. Work together. Love. 

I never grew up seeing thriving marriages. I seen people just together. No passion. No affection. No unity. Just together. Basically roommates. On the flip side, I seen others who wanted people to think that they had the best relationship ever. Only to realize that it was all a charade and that they were just like, or worse off, than the others. 

Our marriage hasnt always been solid. Our first few years were really rocky and honestly I mentally packed my bags more times than I can count. But 12 years in, the one thing that I realize is that our relationship is just that…our relationship. No comparing to others, it just won’t match up. I’ve also come to know that it’s my priviledge to fully support my hubby and vice versa. Sometimes that will mean not being able to do what others expect me too. Or even clearing out my schedule for a few hours to help put wherever I’m needed. Whatever the case, Ive seen/experienced tremendous growth since I have made it my priority to be all in. We’ve gotten closer and saying that he’s my best friend isnt just another cute phrase…it is the truth. And it carries weight.

So, if I could give any advice to another married couple, I would say position yourselves to thrive in your marriage. Date. Converse. Love Strong. Support One Another. Make Love. Kiss. Dream Together. Have Belly Laughs…dont just coexist. 

Grow Individually Together.

Balance…Is It Possible?!?

Over the past week or so, I’ve been thinking alot about balance. 

Is there any such thing?

We have been pretty productive during this season. 

Marriage. 4.5 Children + 1 Bonus Baby (through foster care). Home Manager. Working Part-time. 

Honestly, there isnt a lot of me time. I love the idea of self-care but when the rubber hits the road, I have to make the best of our situation. While I would love to go get a pedicure and spend some time alone, honestly I have loads of laundry that need to be washed, dryed and folded so the best that I can do is listen to one of my favorite podcast and read a chapter in a book while I wait for my children at baseball practice.

I know it won’t always be like this but for right now I have to grab the moments when and where I can. So to all my mommy friends, take the little moments until the big ones are available. 


If I could sum up what I’ve been learning since the end of 2016, it has to be GRACE.  There has been so much going on and so much that I wanted to change, but throughout it, all I keep hearing the word GRACE

Have GRACE toward people and their circumstances

Be full of GRACE even when I have every right to be upset

Speak GRACE over others name

Show GRACE when others are inconsiderate 

Pray God’s GRACE over the lives of others insted of His judgement

Has this season been hard? ABSOLUTELY 

Am I tired? MOST DAYS

Do I ever feel doubtful or upset? YES


Even when it’s hard, you feel uncertain and you dont know how it all will turn out…Ask God for grace- for you to give as well as receive❤❤❤

A Prayer for my Fellow Mama’s…

I pray that on today your Mama heart is filled with peace, love, joy and grace. I pray that as you enter into a new week you give yourself room to grow and become better.

I pray that your patience is renewed and that even in the not so good moments, that you see the hearts of your children and speak life. 

I pray that you take the time to do something just for you, even if it’s just getting coffee by yourself.

I pray that you intentionally send your babies to school knowing that you love them and that you believe that they will achieve great things in life.

I pray that your marriage is blessed. And that you spend time with your husband, praying for him and adding value to your relationship.

Above all, I pray that as a Mama and a beautiful woman, you know that you are significant and Gos made no mistakes creating you…


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16 for ’16…

2016 has been a good year…went by seemingly quick but it has been full. Full of good and some not so good…

Here’s 16 things that I’m thankful for in the year 2016…

#1 Community. During this year I have seen ppl support us in great ways. Our church, neighborhood and school have been a steady stream of support and encouragement.

#2 Minivan. The younger me never seen myself as a minivan driver, couldnt even wrap my mind around the possibility. But the 36 year old, mama of a crew- took a dive into the unknown land of minivans and has never returned. My 2013 Honda Odyssey, Heather the Honda, is neva, eva leaving!!!

#3 Hospitality. This year I have cooked more meals than all my years put together. Being a wife of a head high school football coach has blessed me to make many meals. Throughout the season and summer, Sundays were for team dinners and anywhere from 6-10 teenage boys calling me “Mom” and making our home theirs. Not to count the days when I would get random phone calls from my guys asking what was for dinner. I love it and wouldnt trade it for anything!

#4 Self-Care. Cant say that I have completely mastered this but I have made threading my eyebrows and fresh sushi a part of my monthly regimen.

#5 Introversion. I have accepted that I am an introvert who loves people. I used to long for a best friend-that person who I could tell everything too and spend lots of time with. Well, that person is me…and alot of times my husband. Im okay with having a super small circle and for the acquaintances that life has introduced me too. 

#6 Supportive Wife. I absolutely love my hubby and supporting his goals and dreams is non-negotiable. Being his number 1 fan, being at his events, being his listening ear and biggest confidant are all my priviledge. 

#7 Home Ministry. Home= Husband. Children. Household. If home aint right, its impossible for me to serve at 100% anywhere else.

#8  Welcome Baby. A few weeks ago we welcomed a new baby into our through kinship program. This wasnt planned, by us, we got a call, went through the process and a week later brought home a 3 week old baby boy. Dont know how long he will be with us, just committed to loving him, taking great care of him and praying for his parents. 

#9 Saying No isnt Hard. I used to dread saying no bc I thought I would make ppl angry and that scared me. However Ive learned that its okay for me to say no and without explanation.

#10 Everybody Isnt For Me. I used to really get down on myself if I didnt have an instant connection or feel a certain warmness from ppl. Often I’d ask myslef what had I done or what was wrong with me. Now I’ve realized everybody isnt for me and that’s okay. It doesn’t even have to be anything personal. Somethings/ people arent worth me wasisting my time pondering over.

#11 God is my Source. Its been times when I thought certain hhings happened bc of me or what I’ve done, but I come to realize that God is my source. He is my source of eveything good whether its him providing or allowing someone else to see His glory through my family-It’s Him!

#12 No Longer Living in the Comparison Zone. I used to be so horrible at comparing myself to others. Eventually Iearned that comparisons don’t compare. We are all unique and can only live our lives to the best of our abilities.

#14 Being so Blessed in My Marriage. This year I have seen and heard of so many married couples living like roommates. No affection. No friendship. No sex. No fun. No butterflies. To for me to be in a marriage with a man who truly is my best friend; who I can do life with all while loving, appreciating and wanting to be with him is lit!!! I’m blessed.

#15 Evaluation of My Words AND my Actions. Yes, we as people have to speak good things over ourselves. Heck, I have a list of affirmations right now!! However Ive learned that my actions have to line up with my words in order for change to take place.                             So speak it. Do it. Be it.

#16 Cutting of limitations through Limiting Thoughts. Ive caught myself mentally talking myself out of greatness quite a few times. Like Id think of something or see something and instantly think “that’s great…for her, for them. I couldnt do it bc Im just (fill in the blank)”. No more limiting thoughts. No more self-imposed limitations!!!!!

I hope you have learned some great things in 2016 that will carry you to greatness in 2017.                                              HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!🎈🎉🎈🎉🎈🎉🎈🎉

Loving Without Regard…

A few weeks ago the dyanmic of our family changed…we welcomed a beautiful three week old baby boy into our home. Being foster parents had never been on our family “to-do” list persay but when we got the phone call about a young woman’s, I have a soft spot in my heart for, son needing a place to call home, we couldnt turn our backs.  

This process all happened pretty quick, so when we told our children about it, we were as honest as possible. “A young woman that Mommy and Daddy knows had a baby. Right now she and her son’s father are working to get some things together so that their son can have a safe, happy and healthy home with them soon. Until that time comes, it’s our job as a family to love him and take really good care of him.” This was our speech to our four babies about three hours before we picked baby boy up. 

The whole time I was nervous, excited, blessed and also sad bc I knew his Mom was missing him terribly. 

It’s been two weeks and having a newborn has been giving me all the feels. Above all, my main purpose outside of caring for this precious little one, is to pray for his mother. I mean Pray. Not just a few words, but cry out to God that her heart becomes His and that her life be transformed because of His love for her.

I heard someone ask if there is any way that a person can be a foster parent and not become attached…from my short experience, I would say no. No because, I choose to love this little boy like my own knowing that he will only be with us for a time. But that’s the chance our family is  willing to take in order to give him a beginning filled with love and stability…no matter how long or short his stay. We are loving completely, with regard and with hope and pray for his future and his family.

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What If???

Monday I got a call that was totally unexpected. This call lead to another call, which lead to setting up a meeting at our home on Friday afternoon.

Can I be honest?? Im super excited. I am so amazed at how God works and that He thinks so much of our family that we could be a part of doing something amazing for Him.

Amazed. Excited. Nervous. Anxious. Expecting. Ready.

Those all describe me right now.  I now that this is not a mistake or just something that happened out of the blue…This my friends is a God thing.

So, as we are hopeful to embark on something new and beautiful as a family, I ask those of you who are believers to pray. Pray that God’s favor be with us and that we get to give of ourselves and our home, as a family, for God’s Glory.

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On the Other Side


I read this this morning and for one reason or another, it touched my soul in such a sweet way. It encouraged me like only One can and it told me ever so softly, to keep believing for the best. Life can be tough. Some situations can knock us off of our feet, take our breath away and cause our hope to become a crumbled piece of paper that we’ve thrown into a corner without any regard.

Keep believing. Keep striving. Keep talking to God about your heart, your pains, your passions. He’s listening. He already knows the outcome. He desires the best for you. Keep in mind what your resurrection looks like.

Keep remembering that on the other side of this is greatness…you just have to keep working toward it and expecting it.

*this quote comes from the book, univited, written by lysa terkeurst*

Monday Motivation: Knowing Is No Longer Good Enough

Inspiration and Information without personal application will never amount to Transformation” (from the book Uninvited by Lysa Terkeurst)

Knowing is no longer good enough…Knowing you need to lose weight without eating healthier and working out is no longer good enough.

Knowing you need to be more organized without writing your schedule down and keeping it close is no longer good enough.

Knowing that you have offended someone without apologizing is no longer good enough.

Knowing you need to get out of debt without actually making a budget and plan to pay off bills in no longer good enough.

So whatever it is that you(we) know you need to do to be better, do it…knowing is no longer good enough❣❣❣

Thoughts on Election Day 2016….

I voted. I got my sticker. And now I’m waiting for the results. No matter who is elected, I have to focus on what’s important……being a light.

So friends, here’s a scripture for us to meditate on – Proverbs 21:1 The kings heart is like channels of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it wherever He wishes.

No matter what the results are, lets all take personal responsibility for being better, treating others with respect and kindness, showing empathy and praying for our leaders, country and neighbors. 

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