Congrats On The Seemingly Small Wins….

Sometimes I am so quick to look over the “small wins” in everyday life. I don’t take the time to say “hey, good job on that” whether its to myself or another mama…

It is so easy for me to dismiss the seemingly little things that get done throughout my day that contribute to our home running better, my body feeling better or even cause me to be more efficient at my job.

So dear mama friends, I hope you take the time to congratulate not only yourself, but other mamas, on making it another day, loving on your babies, being a bomb wife/partner, crossing off tasks on your to-list….you’re worth it and you definitely deserve it!!!!👏🏾👏🏾

Real Life In the Mommy Hood…

If I’m being completely honest I haven’t been the most content mother for the past few weeks.

New schedules, lots to do, feeling unappreciated, and as if I am always missing or forgetting something had taken over my thoughts constantly. No matter how on it I was, I always felt like there was something missing-something that I was either forgetting or not doing correctly.

And please dont even include the added stress of being a foster parent to an actively inquisitive toddler whose birth parents I’m currently not on the best terms with.

Or thinking about how can I best help the young moms that I work with that have so many hard things going on in life.

Or just the reality that I am a wife and mother to six children…SIX!!!!

Laundry. Meals. Upkeep of our home. Schedules. Appointments. Work. Transporting to and from. Finding a babysitter.

I took on alllll of these things witb such a tight grip that I was starting to feel slighty anxious and just down…like nothing that I did was right and somehow or another there was going to be a a let down in my day. The only way that I can describe it was that I just wasn’t happy…not so sad that I couldnt get up in the morning and there were good parts of my day. But the type of sad that is bubbling right underneath the surface that showed itself when work was done. This sadness was put on display for my husband and children. A sadness that had penetrated so deep that the discontent was visible, palpable. My children would ask me if I was upset with them and I’d tell them no but they didn’t believe me…heck I didn’t believe me. My husband would ask me what was wrong and I would tell him I was fine but he could sense the shift in our home.

My family would be on edge and I was feeling like I was looking down a black hole of all the things that we undone.

But yesterday it hit me…I haven’t been good at putting me first. Yes, this is so hard for me (like so many other moms) for me to do. If I dont make myself a priority, others will follow suite. I have to be able to do the things that help me to recharge. I have to be able to create moments of peace while I have so many things going on.

I HAVE TO DO IT!!!!

And sometimes for me it isnt about spas and all of the typical things that come to mind when you think of self-care…its just taking the time to stock up on and take vitamins/supplements, walking/working out, or even taking a day off from my typical moomy duties.

So, I’m learning. Learning to listen to my body to resist burnout. Learning to take the time to recharge. Learning to say no when needed…. I want to not only live but thrive in this place called the Mommyhood.

I Am Enough…

I have a friend, Noelle Beck, who is hosting a women’s conference next month and “I Am Enough” is the theme…since I talked to her about this a few weeks ago, these three words have been ringing in my ears.

“I Am Enough” is something that I question myself about and also something that I tell myself daily.

Am I a great wife and mother? Am I a good enough Christian? Am I leading and loving my young ladies well? Am I stewarding my gifts correctly? Am I setting a good example? Am I setting the right atmosphere in our home?

Am I Enough?

I know I cant be alone with questioning every aspect of my being with those three little words, that are so heavy in weight. Am I Enough? In those moments when I feel that I’m not, I tell myself that I am. But it doesnt end with the proclamation…I ask myself where I fell short, what I can do better in that specific area and ask/thank God for His grace to get it, whatever it is, right.

So, to you my fellow mama friends…You Are Enough. Tell yourself you are, make the adjustments and accept the grace.

Happy Monday y’all!!!

**To learn more about the conference mentioned above please visit akrononpurpose.com **

Changes…

What if I told you that when I got up this morning one of the issues that came up in 2017 had presented itself today, on January 2, 2018? 

Well, this happened. And I was so tempted to handle it like I always have with negative self talk, asking why does this keep coming up for me and then the dreaded, deadly comparison game.  

The one thing that is sure is that a new year is only a new start, if you start doing new things, thinking new thoughts and building new normals. 

Nothing changes, if nothing changes…

Lets make the appropriate changes to make this year the best year yet…heres to an ever changing, productive, joy filled 2018!!!🥂🥂🥂

Happy New Year!!!

Happy New Year Peeps!!! Bringing in a new year is always a special time to plan, reflect and dream…

2017 was a good year for me.  Although there were quite a few bumps in the road, I don’t have too many complaints. 

I learned alot.  I cried alot.  I was appreciative of alot. Here’s my 2017 rundown:

Surprise. One of the biggest surprises of 2017 was a new baby. Our family had just welcomed our bonus baby Umari in December and then at the end of January, we found out I was pregnant. I was shocked, overwhelmed and happy all at once.  This would bring our grand total of kiddies to,  drum roll please, six!!! Being pregnant with a baby isn’t the easiest but we got through it. In September we welcomed a beautiful baby boy Matthias to our crew. (Our other children were 11, 8(twins), 4, and 10 months). There was no time to practice, so I had to jump in to being a mother of six with both feet.  I was up and about my normal routine, activities/kids schedules, by time out little one was 2 weeks old. 

Grace. Grace was a word that was ingrained into my heart and mind in 2017. So many things were going on and to be honest I didn’t like them.  I can say there were so many moments, situations and people that I didn’t particularly like but I was always reminded to see them through the eyes of grace. I couldn’t change alot of it. I wanted to change alot of it. But grace gave me peace…peace that I needed to accept things and people right where they were. No judgement. No expectations. No disappointments. Just grace and the peace  to move on without letting people or their situations negatively affect my life. 

Health. Health is so important. I’ll be the first to tell you that this is something that I’ve taken for granted for way too long. I’ve had issues with my blood pressure for the past seven years. After I had our twins, my blood pressure was sky high. I was on a couple medications, but over the years I haven’t been consistent with them.  The same issues crept up in this past pregnancy. High blood pressure. Stress tests. Bi-weekly ultrasounds. Thankfully now, I’m on a couple of meds that are helping me keep things under control. I’ve started implementing vitamins, supplements and just recently a no meat regimen into my daily routine.  I feel alot better and the headaches that were a part of life are no gone.  Nothing really changed accept the fact that I woke up one day with the realization that I have six babies that need me. I want to enjoy my life and theirs too. And aging gracefully and without so many issues, is the goal. 

Speaker. I spoke at my first conference! This was amazing and scary all at once. I’m an introvert so things like this make me sweat and want to take extra long naps. However, I got through it. I left everything I had on the stage and prayed that my vulnerability would be a blessing to some one. (check out akronwomenonpurpose.com/stacyboyd)

I pray that 2017 taught you some valuable lessons that you will take into this new year.  I hope that 2018 brings you all of your hearts desires…more than that, I pray that your purpose is crystal clear and that you confudently walk in it daily….Happy New Year!!! 

  

The Great Reminder…

A few weeks ago I spoke at our women’s gathering about our gifts. The gist of it was that our gifts and talents are given to us by God for His glory and to be a help/encouragement for others, they should be deepened by us, and that we shouldn’t dumb down the  great things that God has given us and put in us to fulfill.

Well, guess what?  I did it. I dumbed down something that God has given me to do. I didn’t talk about this particular thing with a humble confidence that I should have. i spoke with uncertainty and fear. No I don’t have all the answers but I know that God does and that HE will give me the wisdom, favor and plan to get done what needs to be done, for His glory.

So, today I had the great reminder…Its ok to be ok with the great things that God has given me to do and be. Now its time to walk in it and thank Him for what He has so generously given me to do for Him….

First Teachers…

Parenthood has so many twist and turns. Some days I am completely convinced that I am crushing it! My planner is up to date (including color coded events and a current to-do list that has checks by the majority of the items), the kids have had a hot breakfast before school, the house is clean, lines are in the freshly vacuumed carpet and it smells like either a tropical fruit or a warm sugar cookie, and I am dressed in appropriately cute mom attire and lip gloss is applied before 8am.  Then some days it’s the complete opposite. I get up late, the kids are scarfing down cereal, the house is a wreck and I may have picked up one of my youngest from school in my slippers… On those not so good days, it is so easy for me to criticize myself on how I should have gotten up earlier and if I only would have planned the night before, instead of falling asleep with my baby, I could have been deemed a success by the imaginary “mothering board” (these people exist solely in my head when I having not so good days, especially on the mommy front).

But one of the things that has stood out to me as of lately is that I am teaching my children, even if it isn’t intentional. As parents we have to set a standard for our children so that when they grow up and go away from home they have an example to refer back too.  Hopefully that example is a good one.

I want my children to always be able to recognize what real love is and does because of our home. I want them to know what a healthy relationship is because of our marriage. I want them to be able to take care of their home and be faithful to their families and careers because they have seen it from us first. I also want my babies to know how to live gracefully and be able to start again, with a clear mind and heart, when things go left.  All of it starts from home…Our Home…Their First School with us as Their First Teachers.

So today as you go about being a fabulous mama, think about what you are teaching your babies…on purpose and by example

The Intro…

Around this time last year, I got a phone call that would forever change everything. Social Services called and asked if we would be willing to take in a newborn of a young lady I know. We said yes. A couple of weeks later, we were picking up a three week old. 

Picking him up was surreal. I don’t think I drove over thirty miles an hour because I was thinking “I have a little package to get home”. Yes I had done this four times before but this time was different.  This “little package” wasn’t delivered by me. This “little package” was entrusted to my care. After bringing him home and doing all the family introductions and answering hundreds of questions from our other children, it was time to do my formal introduction…
“Hi sweet boy. My name is Stacy Boyd but everyone around here calls me Mommy.💁🏾 I know that this might be a little much knowing that you’ve been in two other places in the last two weeks. By the way, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. But we are here to take good care of you. As you’ve seen, we aren’t new to taking care of little ones but you are our first bonus baby.  I have no idea how long you’ll be with us but please know that as long as you’re here you’re ours. We will always love and treat you like our son. I promise that we will do the best we can to ensure that your time with us is safe, secure and that you will always be treated like family. I also promise to pray for your birth parents and that they can get some things together to be positive examples for you. Like I said, I dont have a timeline for you but I do know that I love you already and that this, this very moment was meant to be.”

If nothing else, I’m learning that love, true love, involves grace. Grace that sees others through the lens of empathy. I still can’t tell you a timeline for this sweet boy where our home is concerned…however I can say that without a doubt he is our #5…

Mom-Shaming Is So Real…

Y’all, Mom-Shaming Is real out here on the internet…

Last week I randomly saw a post by one of the Duggar women that showed pics of her home. So the basis of her post was to show what her day to day is really like being a mother of two. The pics on the post included a pile of unfolded laundry, a stove that needed to be cleaned, a dusty end table and a pile of dirty diapers.

Well, some of the comments were horrid to say the least. People were calling her lazy, disgusting, questioning her motherhood and more. Honestly, they made me reflect. Reflect on a time when I would have been thinking the same thing. Saying what I would never do and even patting myself of the back for not being like her…

However, I’ve learned that my opinion is just that an opinion. Just because I have a certain way of doing things and standards set for myself doesn’t mean that their law, and that every other mom should have to live by them. 

I can remember thinking that bc I was a SAHM and handled all of the housework, cooking, shopping and keeping up with our crews (our children) schedule that every mom must have did the same thing right?  NO!!!! I know people who’s husband’s do the laundry, cook the meals and some who do the cleaning. Is that weird? Absolutely not!!! Every family has a different dynamic and has to do what works best for them. Because it’s not my way doesn’t mean it’s wrong. 

So please make sure that mommy-shaming isn’t a part of your social media persona. Just  because someone shares their life in motherhood on social media doesn’t mean that we should comment negatively on their  post. Sometimes opinions, especially harmful, mean ones, aren’t needed. 

Lets be a community of mothers’ who are encouragers and who share with a tender heart and respectful words….

Monday Motivation: Pray, Prepare…

“If You Pray For It, Prepare For It”…this simple, eight word quote speaks volumes to me!!! I can remember when we were in the process of buying our home. We had been looking for months, put in three offers, praying and believing…but nothing seemed to be going our way. 

I can remember feeling down and out, tired of waiting. But eventually, I did the opposite of what my situation called for. I started packing up stuff, throwing out what we didn’t need, and keeping the house that we were in like it was the home we had been dreaming of. And in time, we found our home and the transition was smoother because of the preparation that took place throughout the process. 

Same thing goes for our goals, dreams and aspirations…prepare, get ready, for what you’re praying for. If it’s to be a speaker- study, perfect your gift. If it’s s new car-keep your current one washed, cleaned out and up to date on maintenance. If it’s to be wealthy- clean your credit up and stay up to date on bills. Sometimes it’s not so much about how much we are doing, it’s about being excellent and consistent in what we are doing. 

So friends and fellow mommies, let’s start, and finish out, this week by Being Prepared For The Blessing(s) That We’ve Been Praying For…