One of the hardest things for me to do is focus on me.  Being a wife, mother, sister, friend and ❤️er of Christ always seem so much more important….there’s always something to do, cook, clean and someone to help.

I was listening to a podcast this morning about developing my talents. The speaker was saying that we are really doing ourselves an injustice when we focus so much on our weaknesses instead of developing our strengths. I can so relate to this!!! I’m always thinking about what I didn’t do right or enough of instead of putting more time into my writing and building a positive place for mothers to be encouraged.

In a way focusing on my weaknesses is easier…they are something that I’ve attached myself to for along time and without them being front and center, dare I say that I’d be doing something that would cause me to step out of my comfort zone and bring to reality the person I see so vividly in my daydreams???

Yes that has to be it. Focusing on the bad takes little to no effort and focusing on my gifts takes planning, studying and being accountable to the One who gave me such grand visions of what I can do and be…

Having a new focus is going to take some time and work. But I’m up for the challenge. It’s time for me to focus on making what’s inside of me visible to all…. 

Fight is what’s needed in most relationships…I’m willing to fight for my family.

I’m willing to voice my unconditional love to them and let my actions follow suit. I’m willing to be uncomfortable and have the hard conversations so that there is clarity and my intentions are fully known to them. 

I’m willing to go the extra mile and reassure them that I have their best interest at heart.

 I’m willing to do what’s needed to safe guard our relationship and take the necessary steps to ensure that we are thriving together.

I’m willing to pray, forgive, step aside when needed, create memories and believe the best…and all this is apart of the fight.

This has been a tough week! So much was going on and all I wanted to do was fix the situation.

Me attempting to fix the situation within my own power and plans lead to me being stressed, upset and completely emotional…

Not until I stepped away from everything did I see that I can’t do everything. I can’t fix everything. I can’t make everyone happy…and that’s ok. What I can do is pray. Be lead by God’s Spirit. Do the right thing the right way…

The lesson in all this…sometimes you have to take the time to step away from the situation to avoid making the wrong decision based on emotions and not wisdom❤️

For the most part, my “whys” have always been my God, my husband and children.
I always wanted to do better and be better for them. But tonight something clicked as I was coming home from volunteering w/my teen and young moms: I want to be better for them too.
As I was thinking about all I had to do to prep for tomorrow, honestly I wanted to put it all off, take a hot shower and go to bed.
But I couldn’t. For one my family depends on me. Two, it’s what I’m supposed to do as a wife, mother and “home manager”. And three, because I want to encourage and inspire all the young ladies that I spend my Tuesday’s with to be the best at whatever it is they have to do.
I don’t want to just be the person giving them all the advice without working on me first.
I want to be an example of what a woman with standards, morals and faith is. I want them to be able to see themselves in me…they are my new whys💜💜

“If live for applause you’ll die from criticism”
I used to do things, ultimately live my life, for the approval, acceptance and love of people.
Everything I did, I did wanting in some way for people to see me as worthy and for me to be significant person in their life.
Turns out I was always disappointed, frustrated and left feeling as if I was invisible and unloved.
It wasn’t on them it was on me. No one, except God, deserves that much of me. I gave all of myself to people who didn’t deserve me. I stayed up at night worrying about people who were sleeping very well. I was trying to impress and please people who could care less.
Lesson Learned: don’t live for people, live for God. I can’t  make someone love me and if I have to try, it’s not worth it.
Xoxo

It’s my 5 year Bloggiversary!!!
It’s hard to believe that Thee Mommy Diaries has been around for 5 years but it has!!!
I started blogging when I was pregnant with our twins as a sense of relief. I was always at the doctor, stress monitoring, or in the hospital due to something pregnancy related. There was so much going on that I decided to publicly journal all of my thoughts and “ah ha” moments.
But soon I came to believe that my writing was a gift and more than anything I wanted to birth a sense of community and encouragement to other wives and mothers.
So here’s my 5 Facts About Me for 5 Amazing Years of Blogging!!!
#1 I’m an introverted extrovert.
Big contradiction right? Well I absolutely love being alone. I’m a deep thinker, I love to eat by myself and there’s nothing I absolutely love more than going to a coffee shop with a book. However, I love conversing with people and learning about what makes them unique.
#2 I am a former Pharisee
You know that bible verse about taking the plank out of your eye before trying to remove a speck from your brother’s eye? Yeah, well that’s one I now live by. I use to be so ready to point out the faults of others without first looking at myself. Though I’m in a truly humbling situation right now, I’m thankful that for God’s grace and more ready to pray for someone rather than do a mental list of their faults.
#3 My Confidence is stronger than ever.
I love me…good, bad and indifferent. Not to say that I’m not working on being better everyday, I’m just in a place where I know that God loves me and He made not one mistake when He created me. So I’m choosing to be my best, think the best and do the best that I can daily💜
#4 I Want To Write Books
I dream about having a devotional for women and novels. Now it’s time to finish!!!
#5 I love to see love.
It makes me so happy to see happily married couples! It makes my heart happy and it I strive to be that to someone else!!

Thanks for 5 years and I look forward to many more, any many other successful writing endeavors, to come!!
Blessings!!! Xo

I used to be the most insecure woman ever. I constantly compared myself to others and I was always having an ongoing negative conversation mentally.
Then one day, I realized that I wasn’t created to be like everyone around me. And I was so unhappy because I was constantly trying to be a carbon copy of who I thought I should be; like everyone else.
Did everything change for me overnight?
No. But things did change when I started to change.
I started a list of affirmations that I speak daily.
I started to take the time to really do what I enjoyed, wear what I wanted and do what felt authentic.
When I journaled I was honest…I no longer just wrote what I thought looked correct on paper. Sometimes it got ugly, I wrote the things that I couldn’t dare speak. And because of that I was no longer bound to the opinions of others or the feelings of inadequacy.
When I was sad and disappointed I poured my tears out over paper…and most times, I could feel my heart mending through my thoughts.
When I prayed I didn’t speak to God w/an invisible audience in view, I spoke to Him from the secret place where it was only Him and I.
Be You. You were created to do a specific thing, to be a unique person.
You’re significant…so when you speak to yourself in those moments when only you can hear…make sure your words are affirming…make sure they make you smile and push you in the right direction💜

Once upon a time I wanted to be, achieve and attain certain things because I wanted to impress people…I wanted them to see my worth manifested through my achievements and my belongings.
Once upon a time I thought that just because certain relationships didn’t withstand the test of time, that I wasn’t good enough to be loved unconditionally by certain people.
Once upon a time I thought that I wasn’t special because I didn’t do things like the people around me…
Then I realized that I’m me. I can’t be or do things like everyone else.
My hearts desire can’t be to please or impress others…
I can’t want the love and acceptance of others more than I want to know and be my authentic self…
Once upon a time I spent a lot of time thinking about people who could care less about me…
I’m so glad that that time is over and that I love and like me enough to know my worth and have taken the time to get to know the One who created me…